Suspect Tries to Elude Police in Dorchester by Getting Naked

BOSTON.COM
A naked man eluded police for more than an hour in Dorchester yesterday evening, as scores of officers and state troopers descended on the area to search for the au naturel fugitive. It all began with a traffic stop gone awry at about 5:30 p.m., when police pulled over a car with three men inside, said Officer Eddy Chrispin, Boston police spokesman. After observing one of the men behaving suspiciously, police ordered him out of the car and discovered he had a handgun, Chrispin said. The man began to struggle with officers, and during the altercation the other two men sped off. The suspect ended up shedding his clothes and gun in the struggle, and fled the scene, Chrispin said.


So let me get this straight.  All the clothes on this dude got pulled of his body while the officers tried to arrest him?  This doesn't make any sense.  What, was this guy was wearing NBA Starting Line-up breakaway pants?  I just don't get how you get buck naked while fighting with police and then you are able to escape and run the streets of Dorchester for a few hours.  This guy sounds elusive as hell. Just stiffing arming cops and sprinting through intersections all while his balls are flopping around for everyone to see. Smooth Criminal indeed.

While Dice-K Implodes, Dream about Our Back-up Plan

Boston.com 

In an interview with the New York Times, Pedro Martinez said he wants to return to the Red Sox.

Q: If the Yankees, the Phillies and the Red Sox called you to pitch and offered the same salary, which team would you sign with?

A: "I’d probably have to say the Red Sox. I would like to win a World Series in the National League, so the Phillies are in there, too. But for the time I’m going to be playing, I think Boston is more suitable so that I can retire with the Boston Red Sox and go to the Hall of Fame with the same hat."

Martinez hasn't pitched since Game 6 of the 2009 World Series. He is 39 now.

I really don't give a shit if Pedro is 39.  Watching Dice-K's implode in the top of the second inning tonight makes me sick. Im done watching him trying to paint the corners of the strike zone when he doesn't come close to having the control to do it.   At some point this season it will be time to cut Dice-K and eat most of the remaining money on the rest of his contract.  Bringing Pedro back around the end of June would not only be a great story but it may be needed.  The emotion of Martinez could be a shot in the arm for a team that seems to have way too many "lunch pail" kinda guys.  the Sox need some personality and it looks like they may need some arms. I know #18 is a major question. Could a return of #45 be the answer? 

Guy Does Street Tricks With Baby Standing On His Head. Is this Real Life?

This has to be fake right?  I mean how many times would this guys son have to fall off and crack is head open before he got this balancing act down?  And many hours of practice does it take to walk the streets and not feel like you are going to kill your son at any moment?  Just want to take this time to give a shot-out to my dad for keeping it real and just sticking with playing catch and taking me fishing down the Cape Cod Canal.  I can live without male bonding via standing on his head.

Ps. These 2 would be killing it outside Fenway Park right now.  Make the guy that walks around on stilts look like an amateur.

Opening Day: People Dancing on the Sox Graves 1 week Into the Season

Ya the Sox are 0-6.  I'll tell you what, this the best god dam 0-6 team in the history of baseball.  Yankees Fans are dancing on our graves 1 week into the season?  Calm down you arrogant fucks.  After CC Sabathia your pitching is as questionable as the NY Rangers chances of making the playoffs. This shit is not ruining my opening day.  Sox come bats come alive today and Massholes get to hold their heads high heading into Friday night.  

Ps. What kind of corney opening day shit is the Red Sox brass going to come up with today?  Forgot they trotted out over played Josh Sacco last year.   "Screw Em!"

Heidi Watney Stuffs Her Face on NESN

"Not my first choice but I got it down."

If I had a dollar for every time I heard a woman say that I would be a rich man.

Fenway Park to Serve Mixed Drinks: Pink Hats Get Wet

BOSTON.COM
The Red Sox have reached an agreement with Mayor Thomas M. Menino and other interest groups to begin selling mixed drinks to fans at Fenway Park, based on testimony before the Boston Licensing Commission this morning. The mayor, police, and community groups expressed support for the Sox plan to begin selling mixed drinks at five locations in the ballpark -- after the Red Sox agreed to relocate one stand further away from the bleacher section. The Red Sox initially drew concern from Menino and Police Commissioner Edward F. Davis when they asked the licensing commission for permission to sell mixed drinks throughout the ballpark, instead of only beer. But the Red Sox agreed to a number of limits on the liquor sales, including a promise to stop selling mixed drinks two hours after the game begins. Currently, beer sales are allowed until the end of the 7th inning or 2 1/2 hours after the game starts. The Boston Licensing Commission is expected to vote on the Fenway proposal on Thursday, but Sox attorney Dennis Quilty said it could still be another month before mixed drinks are available at Fenway outside of the luxury seating where they're already sold. He said the Sox still need permission form the state Alcoholic Beverages Control Commission for the mixed drink plan.


Blah, blah, blah...  All this pissing and moaning about mixed drinks at Fenway is pointless.  You really think you are going to be able to get shitfaced off these things anyway?  They are going to be the most watered down drinks in the history of Boston.  This is a nightmare for dudes that bring their girlfriends or wifes to games.  "Oh babe, can you get me a margarita on your (20 min) trip to the bathroom?"  Boy friends all around Bean town are fucked.  Now you have to buy your pink hat friend a $13 watered down margarita.  But if she is like 99 percent similar to most chicks she will act like she is beep faced off of 2.  Still, these mixed drinks at Fenway are going to rape your wallet.  The Sox have the most expensive average tickets in the League and now they have the most expensive accessories to make your pink hat friend content.

Fuckin Red Sox.  Chicks all over Boston are in Heaven right now.  I can see them now, sitting 2 rows back down the first base line in their Jacoby Ellsbury Jerseys double fisting $13 dollar margaritas they didn't pay for while singing Sweet Caroline.  Ahhh to be a pink hat.

Teams of local police subdue 500-pound man in Mansfield

Sun Chronicle
MANSFIELD - Police had to call for mutual aid from Norton police when they arrested a 490-pound man Sunday following an alleged domestic assault at his Ware Street home.The suspect, Emmett V. McCloud, 41, faces numerous assault charges and was ordered Monday to undergo a mental health evaluation at Bridgewater State Hospital to determine whether he is competent to stand trial and can be held criminally responsible. McCloud, also allegedly gave police and court officers a difficult time when he was brought to Attleboro District Court for arraignment, police and court officials said. Police responded to a home on Ware Street around 1:30 p.m. Sunday in response to a 911 call. They encountered McCloud on the second-floor where he allegedly resisted attempts to be placed under arrest. Police also had to carry McCloud when he allegedly refused to walk under his own power, police said. Police, according to a police report, say they had to use Taser guns on McCloud several times when he refused to stop fighting with police. He also allegedly bit one police officer and kicked another officer. He faces charges of domestic assault and battery, six counts of assault and battery on a police officer, intimidation of a witness, uttering threats and other charges. He is due back in court April 29.


500 pounds? Fuck that shit bro. You imagine coming to a house call for a domestic dispute and the wife is like "ya that asshole Emmett is upstairs."  So walk up there to find a 500 pound beast is just chillin there staring at you like, "what the fuck you gonna do?"  I would have shit my pants. 

Video of this would have been epic.  5-0 just hanging off this mutha fucker, holding on for dear life.  4 officers tazing the shit of him all at once like hes the Stay Puft Marshmellow Man. Than to add insult to injury you have to carry his fat ass down stairs? Hats off to these Officers. I'm sure they wake up everyday going to work mentally planning for the unexpected but I think this shits pushing it.

Ps.  I used to own a Stay Puft Marshmellow when I was little.  Don't make that face dude. Doll was this shit in 1989.