Boston.com ATLANTA—Atlanta Braves pitcher Derek Lowe was charged with drunken driving.Gordy Wright, a spokesman for the Georgia State Patrol, said a trooper stopped Lowe's vehicle about 10 p.m. Thursday after it was spotted racing another car down an Atlanta street. The trooper detected an odor of an alcoholic beverage and administered a field sobriety test, which resulted in Lowe's arrest.The 37-year-old right-hander was charged with DUI, reckless driving and improper lane change, Wright said. Lowe declined to take a breath test before he was released, the spokesman added. The other driver also was stopped, but there were no immediate details on whether he was charged.
Hey, we all heard rumors of good old D-Lowe hitting the bottle a little too hard when he was in Boston so I guess this isn't really surprising. However, it brings up a larger point of how stupid these athletes are. Why not just set up a ride home before you go out and then you can get bombed if you so choose? If I was an athlete I would just hire a driver to bring my ass around. Thats it, he'd have two fuckin jobs bring me from point A to point B and make sure I'm not left blackout drunk at the bar. Of course I'd ride dirty in a stretch hummer limo and Id make him dress like Farnsworth Bentley. The setup would be sweat and it would prevent me from getting shitfaced and racing my car down route 1. Win win situation all around if you ask me.
Rihanna is one freaky girl. You can just tell she would dominate the shit out of you in bed. Shes got the look, the swagger and the attitude to back it up. Sexy as hell on every single level. Then she comes out rocking this razor blade charm on her necklace. I was checking her out and this shit stopped me dead in my tracks. Like I couldn't even concentrate on eye fucking her anymore . Shit threw me off. I kept having the feeling I associated that Razor Blade with something of my childhood. I can't put a finger on it. I'm sure it will come to me eventually.
This franchise has a reputation recently of crumbling in the biggest games. Tonight presents and opportunity to put a major dent in that reputation. Tonight this Bruins team rises to the occasion and puts a foot on the throat of all the nay-sayers. Tonight they play a championship level of hockey that we know they are capable of. Tonight this Bruins team buries Montreal's season and simultaneously puts a pile of dirt on the demons of Bruins' playoff past...
and when they do, these assholes will be waiting for them.
Montreal will come out blazing tonight. As all Bruins fans learned from last year the most difficult game to win in the playoffs is that 4th and final clinching game. However, the 2010 Bruins are not alone there are numerous examples just in this years playoffs. Pittsburgh now faces a game 7 tomorrow after leading Tampa Bay 3-1. Buffalo faces Philly in game 7 tonight after they had a chance to eliminate the Flyers on their own home ice 2 days ago. And Chicago has comeback down 3 games to zero to force a game 7 against Cup favorite Vancouver.
The Bruins need to closeout this series tonight. Anything can happen in game 7. Carey Price is clearly capable of stealing a game and lets face it, the Bruins have won these past 3 games by the slimmest of margins.
Little history lesson for all you pink hat Bruins fans. This video clip from 2004 shows the Bruins wining in Montreal in Overtime to take a 3-1 series lead. The Bruins would go on to lose 3 straight to the 8th seed Habs including 2-0 loss in game 7.
This is a hockey lesson and and example of why the B's need to come out and Terminate the 2010-2011 season of the Montreal Canadiens. Honestly, I can't stomach a game 7.
PS. Alexei Kovalev is still the biggest pussy in hockey. Oh, and fuck you Richard Zednik
Here I am, its 9am and I'm trying to be a good little Chief and bring my ass straight to the library at the ass crack of dawn to write this paper. Not 2 seconds after I park my car I see 4 sundresses and 5 Daisey duke shorts and 2 mini skirts. 18-25 year old college chicks just murdering dicks at 9am on College ave. Like WTF ladies? Im trying to concentrate on this fuckin paper and get this shit done before the Bruins game comes on tonight and you guys have to make me want to run back home a rub one out, killing all motivation I have to write this paper. Now all I want to do is sit outside the Au Bon Pain and creep the shit out of co-eds. Dam you ladies. This fuckin paper isn't going to write it's self.
This series has taken years off of my life. I wanted Michael Ryder benched, Kaberle demoted and Claude Julien Fired. At times thoughts crossed my mind about the changes that were in store for next year because I believed the season was over. All that has changed now. What will they put us through tonight? Who knows. What I do know is, it's Saturday night, I'm already buzzed and I'm ready to beat down the Habs. It's time for some serious hockey.
Barstool Sports NY Well obviously the chick who filmed this just got hit by the bus. I mean she’s completely clueless out there. She’s acting like she got mugged like 3 times. Come on lady, poise counts! Don’t you know that? It’s not about you, it’s about the white dude getting popped at the 27 second mark. Yeah yeah she feels real sorry for him. Probably cried herself to sleep. Bottom line is RutgersFest may be dead in real life, but it still has a pulse on The Stool.
Wow. Talk about shitting all over someones reputation. At this rate im not sure if it's worth continuing my education at this place. I mean what the fuck are people back in Boston going to say when they look at my resume? "This guy went to Rutgers New Brusnwick? Fuck him, probly was one those little bastards that help kill Rutgersfest." The "R"s reputation has taken some major body shots this past year. Right now Rutgers image is leaning up against the ropes vulnerable to that last knockout punch...
Huffington Post "Do not pass go" is about to sound way more dramatic than it ever has before.
From L.A.-based production companyHalf Day Todaycomes this ridiculously action-packed trailer for "Monopoly: The Movie." It's the classic tale of your favorite childhood board game (sort of) with all the tiny metal thimbles, green houses and mustachioed rich guys you remember.
We don't know what's more ridiculous: this trailer, or the fact that as of a year ago,a real-life Monopoly movieis actually in the works.
Holly Shit! You had me at "the community chest." When the hell is this movie coming out? This has to be real right? Can you imagine going to see this in the theaters. Everyone in there would either be drunk, high or tripping their balls off. It's not one of those movies you go to on date night. For one your chick would just shit all over you. "Are you kidding me? You'll go to the movies to see Monopoly but you wont take me to see the Lion King on Broadway?" Honey, we all know Simba takes over and they sing can you feel the love tonight and then some douch-bags in tights skip around the stage. But Monopoly? who knows what happens! Does this kid put up 2 Hotels on Park Place and live like Trump or is he slumming it up on Baltic ave with a split level ranch? (Shit I think that was a game of life reference). Does he get to play with the Dog or the Car? Cause we all know nobody wanted to be the fuckin Iron or the thimble. Fuck that dude. My mom knew not to pull some shit like that. If I didn't get the Dog or the Car I wasn't fucking playing. End of Story. And no dad, it wasn't cool when you would take the car and then hide the dog and act like I had no choice but to be the friggin thimble. I see the dog bro, you just slipped it under the couch while I was watching. Now gimme that little silver Scottish Terrier and roll the fuckin dice.
PS. Daniel Day Lewis would have killed it as the Monopoly guy. Hell he could have just been the same character as he was in Gangs of New York just give him a white mustache.
I died three times. Threw my remote off the wall. MF'd Tomas Kaberle 6 ways to Sunday. Fist pumped like I was at Seaside Heights and crushed 5 Budlights in just the third period alone. I Love you bi-polar Bruins. You complete me.
Come out tonight and punch this Montreal team right in the fuckin mouth. I have watched the Bruins all season and they play like shit when they have to come from behind. I want an emotional, balls to the wall, we are going to break your face mentality from the B's. They have done a tremendous job of neutralizing the Habs potent power-play so no need to worry about playing a little wreck-less. Tonight, they come out physical, chippy and aggressive in the first 5 minutes and keep the tempo for all 3 periods. They play god dam Bruins hockey and they will head back to Boston with the series tied at 2 games a piece.
Wait for it... wait for it... oh and its a 6 -10 split!
Holly shit. Getting a Job at McDonald's is no fuckin joke. How many people are they hiring, 2,000? I'm not sure what I am doing yet this summer. Looks like an opportunity just presented itself. The car took out half my competition. Would you like fries with that?
Ps. Lady in the Red needs to get the fuck out of the way. Good God thats a bright red ass.
Knicks got Rondo'd tonight like a mutha fucka. So much for all the talk on sports radio about Rondo being depressed since his good buddy Perk left. Dude's game was through the roof! Knicks playoff wins since 2001? Zero
So its been brought to my attention that some unoriginal douche-bag on Facebook has stolen my t-shit Idea right off of my blog. Kind of a bush league move if you ask me. Personally I would fell like a cocksucker if I tried to take someones idea and use it as my own. I mean we all learn in college what plagiarism is. If you want to make the T-shirt yourself at least cite the source you got it from and ask if he wants in on the action.
As you are trying to profit off of my own original genius idea I just want you to answer one question for me. How do my sloppy seconds taste? Enjoy swinging from my nut sack bro.
Bruins forechecking tonight was superb. The B's took a page out of Montreal's game plan from games 1 & 2 of the series. Marchand, Peverley and Campell continuously forced the Hab's D-men to play shaky in their own zone and make bad decisions. The Bruins pounced on them early and took the momentum for the rest of the first period. Top line of Krejci, Horton and Lucic played like beast and great puck possession and scoring chances throughout the entire game. Thomas continues to play stellar one minute and let up soft goals the next. With that said, he was HUGE in the last 6 minutes of the 3rd period. HUGE.
Heading into game 4 I want Tyler Seguin in for Ryder. Ryder is giving the Bruins nothing right now. The power play needs a spark. Perhaps the rookie can provide a boost.
Andrew Ference often plays under the radar for this team. But make no mistake about it. If a teammate is in trouble and needs back up #21 is the first to arrive and back that player up. Great showing by the Bruins tonight. Thursday night we will see if they can completely climb back out of this hole.
Tim Thomas was once quoted as saying stepping to the Bell Centre for a playoff game felt like being a Roman gladiator with the Towels waving and the crowd in a frenzy. The Bruins are going to need a gladiator mentality if they hope to take game 3 of this series. Habs fans were already fired up to rip Chara for what took place last month. Now add the fact that Montreal virtually has a chance to end the Bruins season tonight with a victory which would put the B's in an insurmountable 0-3 hole. That place will be going berserk. This maybe the toughest road game for any of the Bruins to play in in their entire hockey lives. Tonight we truly get to see what this team is made of. The first 5 minutes of this game will be a huge indicator if the B's are ready to do battle. If you are shaky early on in Montreal, the fans and the players they root for will eat you alive.
Ps. Bruins fans don't fuck around. You think my buddy got this tattoo to watch his team get their ass-kicked by their arch rivals? No fucking way dude. B's Better wake the fuck up and get back in this series tonight. So my boy here can strut around the beaches this summer with the most bad-ass Bruins tattoo ever created.
(Pretty sure this dude blows his load at the 27 second mark.)
Pink pachyderm just dry humping the shit out of this chick in the stripes. Chick knows how to ride dirty. Just bucking up and down while not spilling a sip of her drink. Thats my kinda Scarlet Knight. This guys mysteriousness stopped on a dime once James Van Der Beek came over and shitted all over his game by flipping his elephant head off. Bro, don't hate on this dude because he had the genius idea to pick up chicks at Rutgersfest with an elephant suit.
Ps. This girl in the striped shirt seemed to like this dry humping session a little too much. huh? #kinkyfetish
Get The RU Winning RutgersFest Shirt worn by this horny elephant here @ Getyourgreek.com. Use Promo Code: chief and receive an extra 10% off.
Celtics looked old as shit tonight. That Offensive foul call on Anthony was a joke. Fuck it. I'll take it! Go Fuck yourself NY. Still haven't won a playoff game since 2001.
Where was the chick in the red hair and ripped jeans when you need her? Dude getting curb-stomped on the sidewalk sure could have used some help as is dome piece was being punted to Piscataway. Hey ass hole yelling "go in his pockets." Shut the fuck up Bro. I mean show the dude a little respect. You already killed him, at least let him keep his wallet and student ID. You ever lose your student ID? Its like you dont even exist on campus.
As more stories and videos trickle in, Rutgersfest is looking more like the move KIDS meets UFC. What happened to college kids just playing beer pong, doing keg stands and flipping cars? People need to just have a good old toga party next year and try to get laid. Last thing on my mind druing Rutgersfest was being a tough guy on the streets. On my agenda was Beer, Pizza and Pussy in that order. But what the fuck do I know. I'm almost 30 and I pass out most Friday nights by 9:30 after 2 and a half Budlight limes.
Montreal has put together back to back dominating performances. Gill and Subban have squeezed the life out of the B's top line. To no ones surprise, the Bruins have the same problems this series that they have had all year. They cant get the puck out of their own zone with good fore-checking, their Power Play is lifeless and predictable and they have been very inconsistent playing at home in Boston. It's tough to admit, but I think there is no way in hell they go into Montreal on Monday and win game 3. Montreal has the best home ice advantage in all of sports in my opinion. The Bruins' grave has been dug, the only thing left is to see what day they get laid to rest.
Ps. Someone please tell Kaberle to shoot the fucking puck.
That dude is passed the fuck out. Cant one of his boys pull up his pants so his friggin hog and ass isnt hanging out? I'm mean jesus christ. With friends like that who needs enemies?
I'm sure will get even more videos posted once all of the people at who were at Rutgersfest wake up from their Alcohol induced commas and finish their late afternoon dry heaves over a toilet bowl.
RU ALERT: 1 Person shot near 32 College Ave. Suspect at large. Non Life Threat injury 04/16/11 03:14:53 EDT Reply HELP for Help.
MYFOXNY.COM - Several people were shot and police had to break up several melees after large crowds reportedly rampaged just off the Rutgers campus on Friday night. Four people were shot in separate incidents and one person was knocked unconscious with a bottle. One of the shooting victims was a 17 year old boy. In another shooting, a male was hit once in each leg. Another man, 19, was shot in the buttocks. None of the victims are students. All the injuries were believed to be non-life threatening and police have not made any arrests. The bottle attack took place in a parking lot on Easton Ave.
A nursing supervisor at Robert Wood Johnson Hospital confirmed that several students who were returning from the Rutgersfest were also treated for injuries. Rutgersfest is a large school-sponsored event on the Busch campus of the university. The daylong series of concerts is held every year. 40,000 to 50,000 people attended the event.
Traditionally, thousands of attendees return from the event to bars, clubs and house parties through the night.
More than 100 extra officers were assigned to manage the crowds in the streets.
Police arrested at least 11 people. An unknown number of summons were also issued for disorderly conduct.
On Saturday morning police tape was still hanging in the area of College Ave. and Hamilton St. There also reports that police had to break up a crowd of more than 200 people in that area. Riot conditions were reported.
A campus text alert went out at 3:14 a.m. warning students about the shooting. It warned that the suspect was still at large.
Garbage, bottles and other debris was scattered in the area when the sun rose on Saturday morning.
Ya, that emergency text message I got at 3 AM pretty much sums up the insanity that is Rutgers fest. Just a bunch of 18-19 year olds completely shitfaced rampaging around the streets of New Brunswick. Starting riots and shooting each other for shits and giggles. I felt like I was in a war zone around 6 PM on Easton Ave. I can't imagine what that place looked like when all the bars closed at 2. As soon as I can find a video on some of this shit I will post it.
These dudes were def out flipping cars last night.
***UPDATE***
VIDEO. Same fight, 2 Different Angles.
Play by play on the second video is epic.
"Oh he poppin a bitch! he poppin a bitch! Oh shit son! Thats a dude fightin a bitch, thats a dude fightin a bitch Son. Thats bitches fighting duuudes."
Wow these bitches with the Rainbow Bright Hair colors don't fuck around. Chick in the Red straight up squared off with a dude like she was fuckin Kimbo Slice. If that were me I would of ran away from that chick so fast it would make your fuckin headspin. As a dude theres no coming back from getting your ass kicked by a girl on College Ave during Rutgersfest.
Reader Email
"I went to rutgers fest last night, got there pretty late due to the time i left... but once i got there and parked by Ray st, and walked back to hamilton and college ave, i walked in to 4 gunshots shot (heard... didnt actually witnessed). Then i got to witness 5 fights between guys and 1 girl fight by the grease trucks, to where quite a large amount of people got hit wit mace for no reason. lol. just because they were "near" the fight. and the people that complained about it, cz they had nothing to do with it.... they got arrested and beat up just because they went to "complain" to an officer. im assuming the officers took it as , "hes coming to do something about it" and just decided to take it to the violent level."
Dam, good thing my old ass went home before 2 AM. I'm all set with getting my ass beat while I trying to chow down a Fat Darrell.
In eighth grade (1996) my mother gave me season tickets to the Patriots. I sat at the 50 yard line the whole season and I got to witness them go to the Superbowl. When the Patriots came back from their Superbowl victory in 2001 I touched the lombardi trophy. I was at the Snow game against the Raiders. I was hoisted up on the shoulders of a complete stranger and carried outside of Fenway Park long enough to get on the pages of the Boston Globe during the 2007 World Series celebration. I ran from the Fanuel Hall to the Boston Garden with hundreds of fans when the Celtics won the title with he new big 3... I have been spoiled as a Boston sports fan. We all have.
Out of all those moments there is still one moment that eludes me. That moment is celebrating a Stanley Cup championship in the streets of Boston. (Before I get too old and become that wired guy that shouldn't be out that late.) The road to that moment starts tonight with me on my couch and it fuckin ends sometime in June high-fiving fellow massholes in B's jerseys on Causeway Street. You're from the city of champions Bruins. It's time you act like it.
LONDON -- In life, Pall Arason was an attention-seeker. In death, the 95-year-old Icelander's pickled penis will be the main attraction at one of the world's most bizarre museums. Sigurdur Hjartarson, who runs the Phallological Museum in the tiny Icelandic fishing town of Husavik, says Arason's organ will help complete his extensive collection of whale, seal, bear, and other mammalian members. The museum has been open since 1997 but Hjartarson has long waited for a human specimen to round out his display. Hjartarson says that Arason, a friend, agreed to help by having his penis donated after his death. The medical director of Akureyri Hospital said Tuesday that the operation was carried out in January under the supervision of a doctor at a local morgue.
Dude, wtf is a pickled penis? Is that exactly how it sounds? Just a dudes 95 year-old's shriveled up hog floating around in a glass jar? Why is this the main attraction? The last thing any dude or chick wants to see is this ancient Icelanders little mushroom tip bobbing in liquid like a lobster buoy floating around in Buzzards Bay.
I wonder if Gunner Stahl has been to the penis museum...
So every year when the Bruins Playoffs start I begin to grow my playoff beard. For pink hats and those of you that live under a rock, a hockey tradition is for you to start growing a beard when the playoffs start and to not shave it off until your team is eliminated or they win the championship. This is not just a tradition in the NHL, it covers all levels of hockey. I don't know how this tradition spread to actual fans of teams but it did. The Bruins actually do a good thing for charity with the Bruins Beard-a-thon. Thats besides the point. Usually I start every year saying I am going to keep it going for the entire playoffs and end up bailing out two weeks in for 2 reasons. First, I'm a major pussy and I can't stand the ichiness of the beard. Second, I feel like this beard is going to cock block the shit out of me. Let me paint this picture...
If I'm at a bar 3 weeks into the playoffs rocking this beard and a girl's talking to me and she says "whats with the beard, did you lose a bet?" What the fuck am I supposed to say? "No, It's actually a playoff beard for my favorite hockey team the Boston Bruins." That just screams major douche-bag right? I mean do chicks dig playoff beards on dudes that watch hockey games from their couch?
This Blog is dedicated to my man Pat Wallace, who I know will be rocking an A+ Chuck Norris Playoff Beard all the way to the Stanley Cup. Because unlike me he's not a pussy and won't shave it off by Friday.
Bostonians know what the fuck is up. They would rather stay home and watch the Sox try to go 2-9 over seeing Charlie Sheen live. I mean how long can this guy try and profit off of his 2 week media verbal tirade? The run is over Wild Thing. It's the bottom of the 9th and your getting lit up. Someone call down to the bullpen. Your show is so bad people barley want to go for free.
Ps. Is there any doubt he is going to Bang Kim_123 after the show? She practically came all over her twitter when he responded to her. #winning
Check that. I don't give a fuck about this song. Someone get me this "Welcome To The Warp Zone" T-shirt STAT! T-Shirt is straight pimping! Only thing that could have made it better is if there was a picture of Mario sitting on top of Yoshi with the title "Riding Dirty" printed over both them.
Ps. This Mallory chick sounds like a real Cunt huh? Why are we not Rapping about Princess "peaches" Toadstool? Screw this Mallory bitch.
Most of you don't watch Wrestling. I know blah, blah, blah its fake. Whatever dude, I've been watching the shit since I was 10. I still tune in from time to time to see whats going down. (Ok, I'm lying. I still watch it a shit load) Anyway, I have noticed Mike "The Miz" Mizanin from the Real World is tearing shit up. I remember watching the real world in 2001 and thinking to myself "what the fuck is this kid doing pretending he has an alter ego calling himself The Miz when he gets drunk?" Well 10 years later looks like the joke is on me. This guy is currently the WWE World Champion. I know you dont give a fuck cause you think its fake but this is serious shit. Being the Champion means you are the face of the mulitmillion dollar WWE franchise. The CEO doesn't just give you the keys to the company if you don't know what you are doing. You heard of The Rock and Stone Cold Steve Austin? Ya, well you can now put "The Miz" from the real world in the same category.
Mike Mizanin just headlined Wrestlemania, he makes millions of dollars, and to top it off he is banging this chick Maryse from WWE in real life.
Ps. I got to be honest. The dude rocks the shit out of his character and knows how to play to the crowd. Plus I would give my left nut to bang this chick. Wrestling may be fake but in the game of life "The Miz" is clearly #winning.
