Son of a bitch! Where were these parties when I was in High School? You know how hard it is to get laid in your teenage years when you have zero game? Here I am wasting my time playing NHL 93 in my buddies garage when I could have been balls deep in Mrs. Robinson while high-fiving Gary from gym class as he stuffs the other side. I'd be a certified legend at Mansfield High School...
Wait. She looks like this?
Oh nevermind. Fuck that shit. I'd rather keep my blue balls to myself and play NHL 93 all Friday night while crushing budlights.
Ps. Her lawyers defense is "she went through a divorce?" Oh thats fine then. Fuck all the little boys you need until you feel good about yourself again. I mean age is just a number right?
