So this story has been all over the web the past few days about this house in the UK looking like Hitler. I don't know dude, I don't think it looks like Hitler. I was thinking it looks more like Jordan.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Kenny Fuckin Powers RIdes in on a Horse on Jimmy Kimmel, Then That Horse Shits on Stage
Not that I really needed to see the shit drop out of the horses ass in HD but did ABC really need to blur it out? Like dude its past midnight and its just horse shit. If a horse shits on stage past midnight I think you should be able to watch that shit happen. Literally
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Someone Get Me These 2 Babies ASAP!
Look at these pimps. Just chilling in their undies all day like gangsters. Eating apricots and peas till they crap themselves. Bet they don't even get up to go to the bathroom. They just shit right where they stand and make some chick clean their ass when they're ready. Just living the dream.
I could watch these two duke it out all day. There is some serious debating going here. I never knew you could have that many interpretations of "Da, Da, Da and Eeeee."
They must be Italian Babies because they love talking with their hands.
Kaley Cuoco Can "Practice" With Me Any Day
Kaley Cuoco loves the Shake Weight and she's not afraid to admit it.
You go girl
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
19 Year-Old Douche-bag From BC Documents Quest to Quit Facebook
My name is Ryan, I’m a 19-year-old sophomore at Boston College, and I am embarking on a pretty radical path: I am giving up Facebook.
I, like many of you, am completely immersed in the Facebook phenomenon and the lifestyle that comes with it. Facebook is my homepage, I have it on my phone, and I end up spending a few hours browsing through my News Feed and seeing what “friends” are up to every day.
Ever since I started using Facebook, I’ve asked myself a lot of trivial questions about my social activities and have spent way too much time thinking about my digital appearance.
Do I really want to put my relationship status for the world to see?
Do you think my roommate will be mad if I crop him out of my profile picture?
Should I end my “happy birthday” to a friend with a “:)”, a “!”, or nothing at all?
Do you think my roommate will be mad if I crop him out of my profile picture?
Should I end my “happy birthday” to a friend with a “:)”, a “!”, or nothing at all?
Eventually, it all just became too much. Instead of doing homework last night, I found myself filling out my brother’s friend’s cousin’s Fast Money on Family Feud. I needed a change.
So this morning, I deactivated my account. It’s gone.
Well, not really. My account is still floating in cyberspace awaiting my return. But I’m officially done. As I thought about it, I realized this experiment is about something much bigger than me. It’s about my generation and the world we all live in today. Can one live without Facebook?
Amazingly, not many of my friends can answer that question – they wouldn’t know. I know this won’t be easy, so this blog is now my outlet. No therapy, no patches, no Facebook. Cold turkey.
I'll be adding posts to let you know how I'm doing over the next few days, or maybe more...if I make it that far. Let’s see if I’m strong enough.
Fuck off Ryan. No wonder why you want to quit Facebook. You treat it like its your nagging wife. You need to calm down with this shit bro. "Do you think my roommate will be mad if I crop him out of my profile?" Who gives a fuck. "Should I end my happy birthday with a smiley face?" Ditto. As a guy you should be on Facebook for one reason and one reason only. That reason is to creep on chicks. Everything else on facebook is irrelevant. If one of my friends has a birthday I don't post some shit to their wall saying Happy B-day Suzzie! I either call them, send them a text or do nothing cause deep down I really dont give a shit about them. I feel no obligation to send a happy b-day wall post to someone I would try to ignore if I saw them walking down the isle at Stop and Shop. "Do I really want to put my relationship status up for the world to see?" Ryan buddy, do I really need to answer this? You hide that shit if your are in a relationship and you promote the hell out of that if you are single. Don't let women fool you. They creep on Facebook just as much as dudes do if not more. If a guys status says he is "single" it pretty much means he is DTF. So ya, you def want chicks to know that.
Ryan, you don't need to quit facebook. You need a facebook coach. Let me take you under my wing and guide the way. "The internet is an addiction yes. But it can be your greatest tool if you harness it in the right way. " -Some shit Mr. Miyagy would've said if he had a role in The Social Network
"Guess what there mommy, nobody gives a shit." http://www.whateverb.com/
Monday, March 28, 2011
Dude Gets His Face Mashed in After Talking Shit
(Go to the 1:20 mark if you don't want to wait)
"You want to touch my face, you want to kiss it pretty boy?"
Nah bro, he didn't want to kiss your face. He just wanted to break your nose 15 times and make you speak to the mic. Has anyone ever eaten his words more than little mini Billy Bob here in the navy blue shirt? And which one of them squeals at the the 2:11 mark? If it's the kid on top its a squeal of dominance. If its the kid on the bottom its a squeal of terror as he is about 10 more punches from death.
LOL!! OMG! WTF??? Oxford Dictionary is Making a Mistake
A crop of abbreviations common to texting and email have been included in the Oxford English Dictionary, legitimizing the language shift caused by rapid-fire, text-based communications.
The online abbreviations for "laughing out loud," or LOL, "best friends forever," or BFF, "in my humble opinion," or IMHO and "oh my God," or OMG, are now part of the OED, reflecting the influence of mobile and Internet technologies on contemporary language usage. The venerable tome recently added all four abbreviations during one of its quarterly updates. The heart symbol was also added to the dictionary, becoming the first symbol to make its way into the book as a "word."
"WTF? I need to get my GTL on so I can find a girl that is DTF and I don't even care if its OPP."
How Drunk Would You Have to Be To Let This Guy Watch Your Kids?
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy!!!!!!! We're in a an Airplane Bathroooooom!
Let me get this straight dude. Every time you go in an airplane bathroom it makes you think about changing your kids shit filled diapers? Bro you're trippin. I don't know about you, but everything I am in an airplane bathroom I think about what it would be like to bang a chick in there and join the mile high club. Last thing on my mind is thinking about how cool it would be to change juniors pampers and then wipe his ass down with a wet nap.
Ps. You might want to put the Iphone down and take that TP out of your kids mouth before he chokes. Just a thought.
Sunday, March 27, 2011
In case You Forgot, This Guy is Still a Piece of Shit
Concussed Boston Bruins center Marc Savard is having "real memory problems and he's quite worried about it," a source told ESPN.com's Pierre LeBrun.
Savard was placed on long-term injured reserve in early February with his second concussion in less than a year. He was injured in the Bruins' Jan. 22 game against Colorado, when he was checked into the end boards' glass by former teammate Matt Hunwick. Savard also sustained a concussion against Pittsburgh on March 7, 2010. He did not return from that injury until the second round of the playoffs and missed the first 23 games of this season...In February, Savard said it was too early to decide whether he would be able to return.
"I'm not going to make any decision about my future until I get some more medical stuff done. I've just got to be patient going forward," he said. "My agent talked to me a lot, and he gave me time to think about a lot of things. It's going to be tough, especially watching them play."
Savard's first concussion was the result of a check by Penguins forward Matt Cooke, who is currently suspended for the remainder of the regular season and the first round of the Stanley Cup playoffs for elbowing defenseman Ryan McDonagh of the Rangers in the head. The play led the NHL to outlaw blindside hits to the head.
Savard missed the last 18 games of the regular season but returned for Game 1 of the Eastern Conference semifinals against Philadelphia.
The Bruins are more familiar than most with the effects of concussions. In 2008, forward Patrice Bergeron went out with a concussion and did not return for almost a full year.
Savard described many of the same symptoms as Bergeron: The way he is sleepy all the time, and how things seem to move slower.
Over the offseason, his post-concussion syndrome returned -- including a bout with depression -- and he missed 23 more games at the start of 2010-11. When he did play, he did not appear to be the same playmaker who led Boston in scoring in his only three healthy seasons with the team.
Matt Cooke is a fuckin piece of shit. His hit was so devastating to Marc Savard you almost forget Savard is still a member of the Boston Bruins. This news is very disheartening. Its been a year since Savard was blindsided by Penguins forward Matt Cooke. He has returned to the ice for a few stints, but clearly was not the same. This is a painful reminder that sports is often more than just wins and losses. Of course the Bruins and their fans miss #91 on the ice. More importantly Savard has three children. Who knows how this has impacted his relationship with them but it can't help. You can say "Hey, injuries are part of the game." This statement would be true. However, a hit like this is just unnecessary. Compare the hit to Chara on Max Pacioretty. Chara preforms that same check anywhere else on the ice and it's a non issue. Cooke preforms the same hit to Savard anywhere on the ice and the consequences are going to be the same. #91's career is remains very much in doubt. While his team plays in the first round of the playoffs Cooke will be watching from home just like Savard. The only difference is one of them will be returning to his team if they make it to the second round. The other will be wondering if he will ever play again.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Bruins Rangers: Ron Duguay Pimping As Always on Rangers Pre-game
Fuck Katherine Tappen. Down here in the New Jersey I get to watch the NY Rangers feed which includes Ron Duguay. I can't even hate on Duguay, dude is just oozing machismo.
Don't hate the player, hate the game.
Friday, March 25, 2011
"My Balls" Bringing You Into Friday Night
"Their so big its really obnoxious. Its like 2 Ewoks chillin in my boxers."
You Can Get Fined for Being Too Drunk in Mansfield?
The fines for public drunkenness recently adopted by residents in Foxboro appear to be gaining popularity, and could soon be spreading south. Mansfield officials said Wednesday an article "nearly identical" to the Foxboro measure - which slaps a $200 ticket on anyone taken into protective custody for drunkenness - will come before selectmen this month for a spot on the annual town meeting warrant. If selectmen endorse the fines and town meeting voters approve them, Mansfield would become the second community in the state to charge people for getting tanked in public.
Binge drinkers beware? Get the fuck outta here with this shit. People work hard all week. They drag themselves to their miserable jobs to make crap pay. The only thing that keeps them alive during the summer is dreaming of that concert at
Whether this law passes or not you can still count on me being shitfaced at Jimmy Buffett with hordes of Mansfield Townies. Beware of that bitches.
Could this Jacket Get Me Laid?
I got this jacket from my cousin because he said it was stupid and he wore it twice. I was like "dude, that shit is tight and I have a big enough ego to rock the shit out of that thing." ...2 years later I too have only wore this fucking jacket twice. Thing is comfortable as hell and the whole thing is made out of corduroy. Who doesn't like corduroy? The 2 times I wore it I felt like dudes where looking at me thinking, "who the fuck is that douche-bag in the brown coat." However, I really don't give a bakers fuck what dudes think. Like most things I do in my life, I only do them to get laid. You know, have money, get a hair cut, dress nice. Shit like that. So I know dudes think this jacket needs to be trashed but what do chicks think? Ladies, if you saw a guy in this jacket would you want to smush him or is this jacket going to cock block the shit out of any dude that wears it?
**See poll on right hand side
It's Friday Gotta Get Down On Friday! ...Is this the Worst Song You've Ever Heard?
"Everybody's looking forward to the weekend. Thursday was Thursday. Today is Friday, Friday, we so excited, we so excited. We gonna have ball today. Tomorrow is Saturday and Sunday comes afterwards!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Is this Bitch serious with this fuckin song? These sound like lyrics I could have made up when I was in 8th grade. I don't know whats worse, the fact that this video has 49 million views or that I just listened to it 5 times in a row to write this blog.
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Bruins Canadiens: Mark Recchi Calls Out Montreal, Shows Why He is a Leader
"He does obviously have a fractured vertebra, but the concussion is obviously really a non-factor," said Recchi, citing how Pacioretty attended a movie several days after the hit. "In maybe a day or two -- maybe a day he felt it -- but he was fine a couple days later. They were trying to get Zdeno suspended and they embellished it a little bit. In terms of that side, they're doing whatever they could to get him suspended. I think the league sent a message that it was a hockey play. That's the important thing and people have to understand. If they deemed it something that was serious, they suspended Matt Cooke up to 17 games for a head shot. They're serious about protecting the players now. That was an interference play at worst. The partitions got in the way. I don't think Zdeno is to blame for that." -Mark Recchi, 98.5 The Sports Hub
Montreal has been bitching and complaining about this for way too long. Instead of talking shit about how they have dominated the Bruins on the scoreboard they have chose to focus on this storyline. The Bruins have taken the highroad and Chara has said he even reached out to Pacioretty but has gotten no response. Recchi comes out and says this for two reasons, first its true. Second, this is what great veteran players do. They take the spotlight of a big game and make sure it shines on them. Heading into tonight Montreal players and fans had one guy in mind for which they wanted blood, that one guy was Chara. Recchi's comments give Montreal another target to circle. The Recching Ball has let Montreal know if they want to pull some cheap shit tonight for retribution he will be the first one in line to throw down and support his Captain.
All bullshit aside, the Bruins need to send Montreal a message that they can compete with them. 4 weeks from now Montreal may very well be the first team standing in their way on the road to the Stanley Cup.
Cue the fuckin Music
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Who Ya Got? Blake Griffin or Little Kid from Southie?
VS.
Little kid from Southie without a doubt. You ever try to take an alley oop pass from a midget in a pink jeep? Nah, me neither. But I bet shits difficult as hell. Not to mention the chicks screaming in the back round. That would have distracted the shit out of me. Soon as I heard that scream I would have ended up losing my concentration and kicking the midget in the pink jeep right in the face.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Little Girl Takes Soccer Ball to the Face
Quit crying like a little girl. Shit fuckin bounced before it hit you. Don't be such a pussy.
On a side note, fat guy in the black jacket has some pissah hand eye coordination skills huh?
Apparently Ralph Macchio AKA Karate Kid, Killed it On Dancing With the Stars Last Night
I don't even watch DWTS and I could have told you Macchio was going to cut rugs and make chicks wet with his dancing moves. His balancing alone on the pole along the beach was enough to tell me believe this dude has the agility and grace to give Usher a run for his money.
PS. Fuck Jaden Smith. There will only be one Karate Kid and his name is Ralph Macchio.
Double PS. Ralph Macchio say he was 49? Holly shit I'm getting old.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Ray Allen's Mom Kills it again at MSG
Celtics Put on a Defensive Clinic!
Nice Hat Spike Hows that 7-9 Record treating ya since Melo came back to NY?
Spencer Pratt Still doing What He Does Best, Being a Major Douche
"Radiation from Japan arrived in California today. First time I've been jealous of the East Coasters."
Check Out the Whiplash from This Punch to the Face
Dam, Ziggy is a beast. I was hoping his head was going to bounce off the wall or that heating vent but neither happend. I haven't seen a dude take a punch like that since Link in Encino Man.
(Go to the 3:43 mark)
Did anyone play a better asshole in a move than Micheal DeLuise? SHOOOOOOOOSH!
Matthew McConaughey is Bored with Being a Sex Symbol
Matthew McConaughey is tired of being a sex symbol. The Southern hottie toldShowbiz Spy that people should get over his ripped abs. “It all becomes kind of old news after a while,” Matthew said. “I worked hard to come West and get a house and a place where the weather is great. I grew up running around in rural Texas, no shoes and no shirt on. I like the heat and the sunshine. I’ve been doing that long before anyone asked me about it.”
Sunday, March 20, 2011
How Much Would You Pay to Watch Patriots Cheerleading Tryouts?
The Patriots held auditions for their cheerleading squad, and approximately 300 women attended. The auditions were held at the Dana-Farber Field House at Gillette Stadium in Foxborough.
I would pay more money to sit and watch this than go to an actual Patriots game. I'm not fuckin kidding you. When in your life can you watch 300 plus smokeshows skipping around in spandex? I would be scouting this shit like I was at the NFL combine. Taking notes on best asses, who can do the widest split and which girl seems to have the most flexibility. My interview process would only consist of 2 questions. "Do you like sarcastic, witty Italian guys that are obsessed with sports?" If so, "What time should I pick you up tomorrow night?"
Oh to answer my question, I would pay $200 bucks to go to this event. No hesitation whatsoever.
Umm... Actually, make that $300.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
The Bruins Season is Falling Apart Tonight in Toronto
This team is dead right now. Its time for Neely to remove Claude Julien and come down and coach the team himself for the remainder of the season. I have seen enough of their inconsistent play. This team has way too much talent to be making mental/training camp like mistakes at this point in the season. Something needs to be done. The Bruins ship is taking on water fast. Will Neely step in and save them before they sink to the bottom?
Friday, March 18, 2011
First Person Mario Makes Me Nauseous
Feel like I am on a see-saw/merry go round when I watched this video. I almost ralphed in my mouth a little from the motion sickness. I'm Sure it doesn't help that I have a killer hangover from pounding one too many Bud Lights at Ned Devine's last night.
School Fight Bodyslam Bullying Fail
Hey mini Mac, Don't expect to fuck with King Hippo and not get your ass body slammed. Everyone knows you make him shut his mouth then go right to the mid section. If you try to dictate the fight your going to get knocked the fuck out.
Ps. Had this kid got dropped on his neck he would have been dead.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
St. Partick's Day Motivation Speech: Ounces
I'm not gonna lie. I'm scared shitless that I wont have the drinking endurance to make it through today. I dont know what to say really. 3 hours to the biggest drinking day of my life all comes down to today. Either my friends and I come together as a team or we're gonna crumble. Beer by beer, shot by shot until we're finished. We're gonna be in hell today gentlemen. And we could stay home like a bunch of pussys on spring break and be bored as fuck or we can drink our faces off in Beantown one ounce at a time. Now I can't do this alone. I'm too old. I made every wrong choice a middle age man could make. I once funneled 9 beers in 45 minutes and I puked my brains out. I didn't go to a big time college till I was 28. and lately its tough for me to drink more than 2 and a half Budlight limes on Friday night and stay awake pass 9pm. When you get old in life you realize drinking endurance gets taken away from ya. I mean thats part of life. You find out drinking is this game of ounce's. One ounce to quick to soon you puke your brains out. Once ounce to slow to sluggish and the average girl still looks busted. The Onces we need are every where around us. In this Town on this day we fight for that ounce. On this day we tare ourselves and everyone else around us to pieces for that ounce. We claw with our fingernails for that ounce. because we know, when we add up all those ounces thats gonna make the fuckin difference between drunk and sober. Between being a pussy or being a true Bostonian. I'll tell ya this, in any big day in Boston its the guy who's willing to die for that ounce. And I know if I'm gonna have any life anymore its because I'm willing to fight and die for that ounce. Because thats what drinking is. The 12 ounces in front of your face! Either we drink as a team or we will puke and pass out as individuals. That's St. Patrick's day gentlemen, thats all it is. Now... what are you gonna do?
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Yes Boston, Its Been 28 Years and I'm Still a Virgin
Yes fellow Massholes and Bostonians it's true. In my 28 years of life I have never been out drinking in Boston on St. Patricks. I know your sitting there thinking how can that be? Honestly, I fuckin hate St. Patricks day. I hate college kids in Kangol hats. I think Guiness beer taste like fuckin piss. I despise douche-bags wearing green plastic hats. Irish car bombs make me want to dry heave just thinking about them. Corn Beef an Cabbage is disgusting and anyone who disagrees with me needs to be punched right in the face. Drop Kick Murphy's are overrated and in Boston people take the term "over kill" to a new level. I hate chicks that wear skin tight shirts saying "Kiss Me I'm Irish" across their chest. (Check that. I love that shit. Its probably the only reason why I'm going)
Tomorrow this life long streak of avoiding St. Patrick's day finally comes to an end and I pop my Irish cherry. I have my lame ass green T-shirt ready. As we speak, I'm hydrating like a mutha fucker on Gatorade and water. This way I can binge drink and not pass out on Lansdowne St. like a pussy tomorrow at 3 pm.
So I ask all you St. Patrick's Day veterans, what am I in for tomorrow? Am I going to be the oldest son of a bitch participating in this shit? Where Should I go? Does anyone really like Corn Beef and Cabbage? If I start drinking at 11am what time should I plan on blacking out?
And how many times will I have to hear this song?
Kegs and Eggs: St. Patricks Party Riot in Albany, NY
There were some great individual performances in this video. First the kid in the grey hooded sweatshirt shattering his elbow while trying to smash the passenger side window. That glass is pretty hard huh dude? Then you got the douche in the baby blue sweater throwing punch and side kick combos doing zero damage. Hey ass hole, if you are going to go to kegs and eggs and fuck shit up at least abide by the dress code and wear some fuckin green shit. The guy at the 19 second mark by far is the star of this video. I personally always wanted to "Hot Step" like MC Hammer on top of a sun roof till it caved in. Bet that guy had chicks drooling over him after this legendary performance. Not sure what the cock sucker at the end is doing gently poking the car with a friggin tree branch. Oh, and fuck the kid in the Mark Sanchez jersey.
Ps. I wonder if this is what Boston is going to look like tomorrow?
Regulaaaaaaaaaators Mount Up!
Nathaniel D. Hale, a rapper known by the stage name Nate Dogg, died on Tuesday, his family said. The cause of death was not yet known, but Hale, 41, had suffered strokes in 2007 and 2008, according to the Long Beach Press-Telegram. Hale was part of an extended family of rappers known as the Dogg Pound Gangsta Crips (DPGC), a group that also includes Snoop Dogg and Daz Dillinger – both of whom responded to news of Hale's death with tribute messages on Twitter.
Regulators Mount Up may have been the best combination of words put together by any man. Regulators was a staple in every athletic locker room in the 90's. Suburban white kids acting hard while dancing in their tighty whiteys will be something I will always remember. I would like tip my cap to Nate Dog for giving goofy suburban kids like myself a song they thought they could rap and dance too. Anytime you were around your boys and you heard "Regulators" chorus come a across the radio you instantly would nudge your buddy and give him a head not while simultaneously saying "awww shit dude, regulators!"
Ps. How we going to break the news to these guys?
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